When Did You Realize Your Voice Had Power?
What was that moment like?
Although I’ve been fortunate enough to exercise my voice and own my power throughout my career, that wasn’t always the case.
I’ve always been opinionated, and there are moments when I have to speak up. But earlier on, I had to prep for those moments. It was something I practiced. There were so many times when I let opportunities pass and beat myself up for not using my voice when I needed to.
However, there was a pivotal moment when I realized the magnitude of my voice, and it’s been a catalyst for everything I've done since.
Let’s be real—many of us have experienced a toxic workplace or two (or in my case, more). At this point, it’s almost inevitable. And that’s largely because not everyone is equipped to be a people manager (a topic I’ll dive into another time). This particular moment in my journey could have been avoided entirely if more companies focused on developing people into strong leaders, rather than promoting those who excel in their current role simply to check a box. I’ve said it a million times, and I’ll say it again: people don’t leave jobs, they leave bosses.
Even though I was a stellar worker (yes, I’m tooting my own horn—facts are facts), I knew the dynamics weren’t in my favor. As a young Black woman, I understood the disadvantages from the start. I was fortunate that my first boss was a Black woman—something I later learned was rare (and those numbers are still disappointingly low). Watching her navigate Corporate America and being her mentee gave me crucial insights into how to survive and thrive as a person of color in that environment.
To this day, I credit her for giving me a crash course in owning my voice, advocating for myself, and showing up authentically. And as a cultivator, it’s been great to keep her in my network. During that time, she got promoted to another team, which she absolutely deserved, and our relationship evolved from boss to friend.
Unfortunately for me, her replacement was not a good fit for the role—or for me. Despite my personal feelings, I respected her position and believed we could both do our jobs while maintaining professionalism. But after a period of tension (mostly on her part) and questionable leadership, I’d had enough. I did my best to tolerate the treatment because I was young and didn’t want to "rock the boat." I had a strong track record and didn’t want anything to tarnish my reputation, even though I’d done nothing wrong.
Then, as it always happens, there came a day when enough was enough. After a particularly uncomfortable conversation where the tension escalated, I knew it was time for a real talk with our skip level manager. I’d had discussions before, but the advice was always, “Give it time. It’s a new dynamic.” But this dynamic was beyond repair, and if we were going to protect the team and the work, something had to change. The reality was—It was either her or me.
I was nervous, but my frustration with her disrespect and poor leadership fueled me to speak my truth. I knew I didn’t deserve what I was dealing with, and I stood firm in that conviction. To my relief, our manager saw the situation clearly. He advocated for me and my work. My boss was replaced with someone more fitting (she was moved to another team in a non-management capacity), and my new manager and I had a peaceful, productive, and respectful working relationship.
I’ll always remember that moment because it marked a turning point in my journey. I had hesitated for so long about speaking up and finding the “right” way to do it. Having a strong Black woman as an example in the workplace helped me realize how I deserved to be treated. Since then, I’ve never looked back. Over the years, there have been many more moments where I’ve had to advocate for myself, and I can proudly say I’ve stood in my power each time. It may not always yield the outcome I want, but owning my voice and my power—regardless of the result—is what matters most to me.
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